If I owned a company, I would hire my husband.
He really is one of the best workers I know.
I'm not just saying this because he's my husband and I want him to get a nice job with a fat paycheck (so I can teach Pilates and eventually get a fat paycheck for that). I'm saying this because before we dated, before we were really even friends, we worked together. And seeing him in action is 1,000,000 times more convincing than anything I could put down on paper. Where most people would curse, cry, or call on a higher-up, he somehow smiles and keeps going. Hotels are notorious for having some of the meanest, most dissatisfied customers with whom you will never reach any acceptable solution. They like to blame the one person who is trying to help them for every single problem they have, including the bus running behind or the prices of the restaurant across town. Often, they look down on you, thinking that they can take their bad day out on the person in the ugly (company-issued, mandatory) tie, not thinking that said person is human, has feelings, and most likely has an education. Traveling can make people crazy-eyed, drooling, growling versions of themselves, even when aforementioned traveling is "a vacation." (One thing you learn in the hospitality business is that "a vacation" is usually very, very hard work.) Yes, working in a hotel, especially in a management position that requires you to deal with all the complaints that the other employees could not, reveals to you the absolute worst in your customer. (I'm sure there are other areas with horrible customers i.e. retail fights over the last sale sweater and stinky people coming in for a wax after Bikram yoga and no shower, but I digress.)
My husband, however, is so damn nice to people even if they are yelling at him and calling him an idiot (yes, I have seen this personally) and he keeps smiling his beautiful smile at them. It's insane. Thirty minutes after the moment I would have decked a woman in the face, breaking her veneers and ruining her rhinoplasty, Ben is still smiling at her, and damn it if she isn't starting to flirt with him. God.
However...on paper, sometimes this sort of thing is not as impressive as the sort of thing you would see on the resume of, say, a computer geek. "UNIX SYSADMIN WITH 6 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE AT FORTUNE 500 PUBLICLY TRADED MULTIBILLION DOLLAR GENETIC ENGINEERING FIRM...REPAIRED SYSTEM MULTIPLE TIMES WHEN CONTINUED FAILURE WOULD HAVE RUINED YEARS OF RESEARCH DATA AND MILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF INFORMATION" somehow seems a bit more impressive than "6 years of hotel management experience." Yeah.
And, my husband is everything to me...except a writer. I challenged him to write his own cover letter, and it was everything a cover letter should not be. (Sorry, sweetie.) Boring, repetitive, not selling himself, etc. So I offered to write his resume and cover letter for him. Why not? People pay a resume writing service $35-over $100 to pump out a better resume than they themselves can write. Why shouldn't I do it for my husband?
So I did. And I am quite impressed. See, I thought I hated writing resumes, but it turns out I only hated writing my own. (For several reasons, including the fact that I think there is no way to make "WORK HISTORY HAS GAPS DUE TO EXTRA TIME SPENT IN SCHOOL, BY THE TIME I FINALLY CHOSE A MAJOR I HAD EXPERIENCE IN NEARLY EVERY ONE OFFERED AT THE UNIVERSITY, I REALLY CAN LEARN TO DO ANYTHING AND MY IQ IS PROBABLY TWICE THAT OF THE LAST TWO PHD'S YOU HIRED AND IF I ACTUALLY GIVE A CRAP ABOUT WHAT I AM DOING I WILL TOTALLY KICK ASS" sound better than the boring old "2 YEARS DOING THIS, WHILE I RAISED 8 KIDS AND MADE THE DEAN'S LIST EVERY SEMESTER, 3 YEARS DOING THAT, WHILE I VOLUNTEERED EVERY WEEKEND AND SLEPT UNDER A BOX SO THAT I COULD GET MY MBA" even if that person has little grasp on common sense. Again, I digress.)
I wish I could put this to use, but 1,000,999 people are advertising resume services and honestly, if someone comes along that I can't help, I would probably freak and think "Oh God I am a shitty writer and Oh God I need to just forget it. Oh God Oh God Oh God." That and, I seem to attract freaks in life, and I am sure that this would be no different.
That said, at least the whole ordeal was an ego boost. His resume has gotten an interview for, oh, 75% of the jobs he has applied for. Whereas mine, even in years past when I was still working and didn't have to make up a reason why I was not employed, got about 10%.
Maybe it is my great cover letter, or maybe it is just his field, but it's something, and that's about all I have right now...little "something's."
Ah, the secret boyfriend. So secret he doesn’t even know about it. Is it cheating if you have a real boyfriend and a secret boyfriend at the same time? ...